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The Romanian journalist Lucian Davidescu wrote a Facebook post about the recent scandal in Romania regarding the investigation by the Romanian security forces of a 101-year-old war veteran, General Radu Theodoru:
 
"Romanian Intelligence's Insane Ploy to Fight Off Two Coups At Once

A "Geriatric Coup” led by a 101-Year-Old General and His Dacian Elder Council was foiled, just as the previous one – with a jammed paintball pistol – unraveled barely in time.
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"Two pieces of news for today: one bad and one good. The bad: The arrest of six people accused of treason confirms that we have professional intelligence services, but it also shows that we have very serious problems with psychiatric services . The good: If Moscow is relying on such individuals, plus Călin Georgescu, to bring Romania back into its sphere of influence, then we are safe.”

This is the Facebook post of Silviu Predoiu, former head of Romanian foreign intelligence (SIE), poking fun at domestic "rivals” (SRI) after a truly wild day.

It all started the evening before when police searched the house of 101-year-old retired General Radu Theodoru, looking for evidence of a coup plot. Mr. Theodoru, a former politician in the '90s, is quite a nasty figure – foul-mouthed, antisemitic, and a war crimes denier. To fathom him leading a coup, however, is quite a leap.

By morning, prosecutors made arrests, announcing they had discovered a group of six plotting to overthrow the constitutional order, replace the entire government, change the flag, anthem, and even the country's name. The general was a mascot of sorts. But after worrisome press releases from DIICOT (the same anti-RICO Prosecutor's Office that tried to prosecute the Tate brothers for 3 years before unexpectedly letting them fly) and SRI (the internal intelligence agency), the media started to dig deeper.

It turns out the plans were in plain sight, on the group's Facebook, TikTok, YouTube, and makeshift website since last summer. They intended to rename the country Geția, drawing from the ancient Dacian kingdom. The country would be run by a Conclave of the Wise (13 members), overseeing a Council of the Elders (130), which would manage several Committees of the Pops (1300 in total). The total comes to 1444 people, implying a supreme leader—most likely the author calling himself Deceneu On Cogaion, after an ancient priest and a sacred mountain.

At this point, it was obvious this was more a mental health issue than a national security threat. An uproar followed, with DIICOT and SRI becoming the butt of endless jokes, capped off by the former intelligence official quoted earlier.

So, what's with the Russians? Apparently, one of those arrested attended an event hosted by the Russian Embassy in Bucharest. The day before, Romania expelled the wrong Russian military attaché and his deputy. At that point, it was all tied to a completely separate alleged coup attempt. The "traitor" called the Russian Embassy, asked to speak with the deputy military attaché, was told to hold the line, but no one ever picked up.

By now, things likely don’t make sense. If you’re reading this Substack without much background in Romanian affairs, you might think it’s satire or propaganda. It’s not! While the facts I report are often genuine comedy gold, they are meticulously fact-checked for accuracy and easy to cross-check with reputable public sources.

To clarify: there are two separate coup attempts being investigated. One involves Mr. Horațiu Potra's "legionnaires,” whom I’ve written about before. The guy who held the line at the Russian Embassy is loosely tied to this.

These guys are armed and dangerous due to their mercenary work in Africa, but there’s no credible evidence they ever tried to overthrow anything. Last december, when they first tried to arrest them for coming to Bucharest, the court found that, bar a couple of pocket knives, the only "weapon” they carried was a malfunctioning paintball pistol.

Last month prosecutors searched Potra's house again and found actual weapons and stashes of cash, but also that he had conveniently flown off to Dubai and left his safe door unlocked.

The second coup attempt, uncovered yesterday, is from the Dacian Elders. While they have wild ideas about the country’s future, there’s no evidence they’ve ever wielded weapons.

So, in a country where no coup has been attempted in the last 35 years, "intelligence" has discovered two in the past three months following the annulled elections. This likely stems from their accusations of Russian interference, for which they’ve yet to provide any proof.

Hopefully, the "plot” is all made up, because if it’s true, people are rightfully asking why it took three months to uncover a coup attempt that was posted all over the internet. Would they have ever found a secret one?

All this comes from the domestic intelligence agency with the highest budget in the EU (as large as Germany’s, France’s, and Italy’s combined). Romanians today can proudly say that, out of all spy-busters, we have the most expensive buffoons.", concludes Lucian Davidescu.